(Ruby’s cell phone rings. She answers.)
Ruby: Caller ID is a marvelous thing. What’s up?
Ginger: Ruby…where are you?
Ruby: In the kitchen making dinner. Why?
Ginger: What’s for dinner?
Ruby: Chicken fingers. I repeat: Why?
Ginger: Chickens have fingers?
Ruby: Do I even dignify that with a response?
Ginger: Depends, is asking a rhetorical question about responding to a ridiculously foolish question considered a response or is it just acknowledging the presence of a ridiculously foolish question?
Ruby: I’m non-commitally acknowledging a ridiculously foolish question.
Ginger: I see.
Ruby: So, why?
Ginger: Because I have eyes that work properly.
Ginger: You asked why I see, I answered. Don’t pinch the bridge of your nose over this.
Ruby: You know me a little too well.
Ginger: Thank you, I pride myself on knowing friends and co-conspirators.
Ruby: Happy to inflate your ego that much more. Wait, co-conspirators?! What am I co-conspiring on?
Ginger: How long till the chicken fingers don’t need your undivided attention?
Ruby: Define ‘undivided attention.’
Ginger: You can leave the house.
Ginger: Can’t or Don’t Wanna?
Ruby: More like Don’t Wanna.
Ruby: Did you just truly say the word “gasp?”
Ginger: Yes. The moment called for not just a gasp, but also the statement of the word ‘gasp.’
Ginger: Why don’t you want to?
Ruby: Fly’s over. I’m making him dinner and we’re going to eat it and then watch a movie.
Ginger: All by yourself? That’s boring!
Ruby: Says the woman who rents three movies at a time by herself and watches them all weekend.
Ginger: But now I need to leave the apartment.
Ginger: I just had a flash of brilliance!
Ruby: I’m actually now filled with an understanding of the true meaning of the word “terrified.”
Ruby: I’ll have you know I drove in rush hour traffic with the air conditioning not working properly. Don’t call me a wimp.
Ginger: Why didn’t you fix it?
Ruby: I was on my way to the store to get the replacement piece. I couldn’t fix it quite yet.
Ginger: Ooh. Understandable. I retract the wimp remark.
Ruby: Good. So, since there’s no way of getting around it, what was your flash of brilliance?
Ginger: I said it was a “FLASH” okay?
Ruby: You forgot.
Ginger: Well, we went on a lot of tangents!!!
Ruby: I’m hanging up now.
Ginger: Fine. Go enjoy your boring evening.
Ruby: Thank you, I shall. You enjoy yours.
Ginger: I guess it’s back to re-organizing my CD’s.
Ginger: Puh-leeze. First by band, then year of release, then genre, then–
Ruby: Hanging up now.