Wedding, Bouquet, Car…

Ginger: Ruby? Open up!

Ruby: Ginger, I honestly don’t know why you…what are you wearing?

Ginger: I believe it is referred to as a ‘dress’ in some cultures.

Ruby: Did we have plans this evening?

Ginger: No. We have a crisis this evening.

Ruby: What is the definition of ‘crisis’ this evening?

Ginger: I caught the bouquet.

Ruby: That’s it? That’s the crisis?

Ginger: You didn’t let me finish the story.

Ruby: I see. Who got married?

Ginger: The bride, I hope…

Ruby: Ginger…

Ginger: I don’t know, like I’m supposed to keep track of these things?

Ruby: Well, why were you there?

Ginger: They were short a bridesmaid. The dress fit me. It was Fate, laughing her butt off at my expense. I had a free afternoon. I don’t know, pick a reason!

Ruby: Well…but…you don’t believe in fate.

Ginger: Not “fate,” Ruby, Fate. My roommate in college.

Ruby: …you had a roommate in college?

Ginger: Why?

Ruby: It’s just so…I always had you pegged as a loner in college.

Ginger: No, no, loner was my high school years. Always surrounded by friends was how I spent college.

Ruby: What about grade school?

Ginger: Ruby! Focus! Bouquet in my hands!

Ruby: Why did you reach for it?

Ginger: I wasn’t! I was hailing a cab!

Ruby: That’s a weird spot to throw a bouquet.

Ginger: Well, technically, she was throwing the bouquet at my head, but…

Ruby: What did you do?

Ginger: I ran.

Ruby: No, to start her chasing you.

Ginger: I ran.

Ruby: I think I’m lost…

Ginger: The DJ announced it was time to throw the bouquet, asking all the single ladies to go onto the dance floor. So I left. And then Fate chased me. So, I ran.

Ruby: You ran?

Ginger: I ran so far away.

Ruby: Don’t tell me…

Ginger: Couldn’t get away.

Ruby: Yeah…tell me about the cab, though?

Ginger: Right, well I got out of the reception hall and tried to hail a cab, but she threw the bouquet at my head.

Ruby: Why?

Ginger: I don’t know. She’s trying to set me up with eight guys right now. I swear, she’s just trying to see me wed and bed.

Ruby: Wed and bed?

Ginger: Isn’t that what I said?

Ruby: I hope this is just to get me back for Friday, when I emailed you the list of puns…

Ginger: It might be.

Ruby: Well, despite that, what happened next?

Ginger: I got in the cab and left.

Ruby: You left?

Ginger: Well, yeah, I had everything I needed with me.

Ruby: But…she threw the bouquet at your head, you got in the cab and you left?

Ginger: If she’s not going to be a gracious hostess, I’m not going to remain at the party.

Ruby: You’re just going to take your ball and go home, huh?

Ginger: Yes.

Ruby: So, why are you here?

Ginger: She’s waiting at my apartment.

Ruby: She’s what?

Ginger: Waiting at my apartment. With Elle. Apparently, they think I need to return to the party.

Ruby: Why?

Ginger: I may have inadvertently taken the wrong cab.

Ruby: What do you mean by that?

Ginger: As in, maybe there were no cabs, it was all valet parking and I had the bride-n-groom’s getaway car ticket.

Ruby: Ginger, there is no easy way to say this to you…

Ginger: Is there ever?

Ruby: Good point. But, nevertheless…if it’s not your ball, you can’t take it when you go home.

Ginger: But it’s so pretty!

Ruby: No.

Ginger: But, Ruby…she threw a bouquet at my head!

Ruby: That’s no reason to steal their car.

Ginger: Man…I knew I shoulda just gone to the track without you…

Ruby: Well, now you know for future reference. I will not let you commit a felony just to teach a lesson to your college roommate.

Ginger: She had it comin’.

Ruby: I’m sure. Now, come on, let’s go return the silly car.

Ginger: But, Ruby!

Ruby: No, Ginger.

Ginger: If you’da been there, I’m sure that you woulda done the same!

Ruby: No more musicals about felons for you…


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