Just Another Day…

In one office…

Dorritt: Ginger, we need these two accounts to be in the same file. I don’t know how they got placed in different spots – they look to be one and the same.

Ginger: Okay, I’ll get right on it.

Dorritt: And I just want you to know, I don’t blame you for that missing letter incident.

Ginger: That’s good to know. Even though I already admitted it got stuck behind my chair and that’s why it was late.

Dorritt: We all have little things we forget from time to time and it’s important to remember we’re all human and to just learn from these little mistakes.

Ginger: Yeah. I know better than to stack envelopes on the floor now. We’re good.

Dorritt: Just so we’re both on the same page. Make sure we get those accounts in the same file!

Ginger: Okay. Um…Dorritt?

In another office…

Blake: Ruby, I’m surprised to see you here!

Ruby: …you are?

Blake: And you look fantastic!

Ruby: Okay…thanks…why are you surprised to see me here?

Blake: Well, it’s just so soon after the baby.

Ruby: What baby?

Blake: What do you – oh. Right. Um…

Ruby: What. Baby. Blake?

First office…

Ginger: But they’re not the same account. I can’t file them together.

Dorritt: Of course they’re the same account. They have the same name!

Ginger: Well, actually, they don’t. One is Pyraht, Inc and the other is Pieratts Corporation.

Dorritt: They’re in the same location.

Ginger: I was unaware that New Mexico and Tennessee were suddenly sharing the same space…

Dorritt: What?

Ginger: Nothing. Look, they even have different websites.

Dorritt: You can’t rely on websites as your only basis for this.

Ginger: I’m…not

Second office…

Blake: No, it’s just, y’see, everyone else seemed to be…and I just…I got you confused with…

Ruby: You’ve seen me every Monday through Friday for the past fifteen months! When did I suddenly start to look pregnant?

Blake: There were so many baby showers around the same time and I just…

Ruby: Blake, calm down, I’m not going to hurt you…

Blake: Obviously I was mistaken…and…

Ruby: I just think it’s a little funny.

Blake: Funny enough that you won’t sue?

Ruby: When did you mistake me for that person??

Blake: No, it’s not that! I just – some people would…I mean, it’s—

Ruby: Not again…calm down, Blake…breathe…

First office…

Ginger: Seriously, they have two different phone numbers! They sell entirely different products! They have two different CEO’s!

Dorritt: Now, Ginger, just because we don’t want to do the work doesn’t mean we can slack off. I know it can seem a little redundant to come in every day and do similar tasks every day, but it’s important we stick to our routines.

Ginger: Pyraht, Inc employs 500 people. Pieratts Corporation is multi-national and employs 500,000!

Dorritt: When you’re finished, could you set up a request to research the facility’s location?

Ginger: Oh, sure, not a problem. In fact, I can tell you right now that Pyraht, Inc is in an excellent location – it’s in New Mexico!

Dorritt: You never can tell, Ginger. And it’s in Tennessee. Look at the file, Ginger – this is a requirement of your job, you know. I’m really very busy, I can’t cover for you all the time.

Ginger: …you…can’t…what?

Second office…

Ruby: Okay, so we’ve agreed that there are a lot of pregnant women in the office right now.

Blake: Yes.

Ruby: And I have been attending a lot of baby showers.

Blake: Yes.

Ruby: And I took last Friday off.

Blake: Right.

Ruby: But not because I was going into labor.

Blake: Some women don’t get very large in pregnancy, you know, I had a cousin who delivered a healthy baby boy and she never got bigger than –

Ruby: Blake. She was in high school and was trying to hide it from her parents. You told me that story.

Blake: Right.

Ruby: I took last Friday off.

Blake: But not because you were going into labor.

Ruby: Good. And I’m a level-headed person…

Blake: …who isn’t going to sue me because I had a momentary lapse of memory and successfully put my foot in my mouth.

Ruby: Good. Now. I think we have a meeting in a few minutes.

Blake: Yes.

Ruby: I think we can both just forget about this whole incident.

Blake: Absolutely.

Ruby: So, how about you climb down from the chair and we go in and present the findings from the report we compiled last week.

Blake: Right. See, the thing is…

Ruby: Blake…?

Blake: Well, you weren’t here on Friday and I thought we wouldn’t be presenting because I thought you…were…right – so I didn’t exactly get to finish the presentation.

Ruby: How much is left?

Blake: Well, you see, I thought we’d get an extension and I needed to work on that other project I was helping Barry on and so I got a lot done for that…but…

Ruby: How much is left?

Blake: Just a few slides, really.

Ruby: How many?

Blake: Eight…teen.

Ruby: You mean we could’ve been working on finishing the presentation if you hadn’t been afraid I was going to stab you with my glitter pen for thinking I just gave birth to a baby on Friday?

Blake: Um…it would appear that is the case.

Ruby: Blake?

Blake: Yes?

Ruby: You might get to discover what it feels like to be stabbed with a glitter pen.

Blake: That’s why I hadn’t gotten down from the chair yet.

(phone rings)

Ruby: Hang on. I’ll get that. Hello?

Ginger: Hey, how’s it going?

Ruby: Peachy. Yourself?

Ginger: Just another day in paradise. Hey, listen, could you remind me – just once more – why it is a bad idea to commit murder in the workplace.

Ruby: Bad timing.

Ginger: Ah. Well, let me know if you need any tips on confusing the forensics.

Ruby: I watch NCIS, too, Ginger.

Ginger: Yes, but do you take notes?

Ruby: …Ginger…it’s bad. Very, very bad.

Ginger: I’ll call you when you’re more convincing.

Ruby: Sounds fair.


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