Ginger: So, there I was, on the phone with this woman because she called me, right?
Ruby: Two, please.
Ginger: And she says “Oh, but I didn’t call you, I received a call from you, cause I picked up my phone and pressed ‘redial’.” At which point I laughed, thinking she was kidding, right? But she wasn’t. She was serious! She got all offended!
Fly: One, Ginger.
Ginger: I mean, look at the word. Redial. RE-dial. To dial again. She called me, then hung up, then called me back, certain I called her first. Why would I call someone in marketing to begin with?
Elle: I’ll take one, as well.
Ruby: If I haven’t mentioned it, it’s good to see you again, Elle.
Elle: Thanks, Ruby.
Ginger: I mean, yeah, I have ideas and all, but that doesn’t mean I’m just going to call someone in marketing out of the blue.
Max: One card, thanks.
Ginger: One card for Max Power.
Max: That’s still not my name, no matter how many times you say it.
Ginger: And dealer takes five.
Ruby, Fly & Elle: NO!
Ginger: Fine. Dealer takes two.
Ruby: Remember the rules, Ginger? Taking five cards means you fold.
Fly: And folding is bad.
Elle: Well, until the betting gets over your head.
Max: Seriously, why do you play with her if you have to re-explain the rules every hand?
Ginger: Ooh! See? Even Max Power knows the power of re! Re-explain means to explain again! …wait…I should be offended, shouldn’t I?
Elle: No, honey, just hold your cards closer to your chest. Again.
Ruby: I can’t believe you’ve never played poker, Ginge.
Ginger: I’ve never really been able to remember why I want the spades so much.
Fly: Are you talking about the game Spades? Because you don’t want spades in that.
Ginger: Wait, I don’t? No wonder I never won! My sister lied to me as a child.
Ruby: Fly’s messing with you, Ginger. Your sister isn’t.
Ginger: Not now, but then…you didn’t know her then…she lied all the time…
Max: Are we going to bet, or sit around discussing problematic childhoods?
Ginger: Kudos for the attention to the game! He’s much better than the last guy we dragged into this.
Ruby: I’ll start the bidding with 5 M&M’s.
Fly: I’ll see.
Elle: I can play that.
Max: I’ll see and raise you one gummi-bear.
Ginger: That’s not a gummi-bear. It’s a cinnamon bear. Sheesh. I take it back, Rubes, he’s just as useless as the last guy.
Ginger: I’ll see the bet of 5 M’s, one cinnamon bear and I’ll even raise you one N&N.
Ruby: Don’t ask. Okay, so six M’s and one bear, huh? All right. I’m in.
Ginger: 5 M’s, 1 N and one bear.
Ruby: Hush, Ginger, the adults are playing.
Fly: I’m in.
Elle: I’ll raise you another four M’s, just to make it even – and that makes it two bears, right? 10 M’s is still one bear?
Ginger: 9 M’s, 1 N and one bear.
Max: Right. So we’re up to two bears. Okay. I’ll raise to 2 bears and 5 M’s.
Ginger: Okay, troops. I know I’m asking a lot of you. But Shepherd Book used t’say if you can’t do somethin’ smart, do somethin’ right.
Ruby: Ginger, you’re in or you’re not. And there are no Reavers in the pot.
Fly: The pot, Ginge. There are no Reavers in the pot.
Ginger: The plot?
Elle: Oh for goodness’ sake. Ginger, in or out?
Ginger: I aim to misbehave. I’m in.
Ruby: All right, two bears.
Fly: I think I’m gonna fold before Ginger tries to convince the pot to hold until she gets back.
Ruby: A Serenity reference all on your own? I’m so proud!
Ginger: I think I might cry.
Elle: These here? Tears of joy, Fly. Tears of joy. And I’m out as well. My troops are officially scared of Pot-Reavers.
Ginger: Told you they exist.
Max: Look, I thought we were gonna play poker, not Name That Fruit.
Ginger: My goodness! Was that a – did you just make a Jasper Fforde refference?
Ruby: Of all people we pulled from the coffee shop.
Elle: Ginger, did you hijack this man based on what book he was reading?
Max: Wait, all of you have read The Eyre Affair?
Fly: Not all.
Ginger: No wonder you ffolded.
Ruby: Ginger, I will kick you if you start with that double ‘f’ thing again.
Ginger: Can I go back to Firefly?
Max, Elle, Fly & Ruby: Yes.
Fly: I believe it still falls to Max to continue the hand here.
Max: Sorry. Let’s see…we’re up to two bears, right?
Ginger: Wait, what are the rules? Can he raise his own bet?
Max: How long have you been playing?
Ginger: This game or poker in general?
Ruby: Ginger, stop separating the M’s from the N’s…you’re distracting people.
Max: In general.
Ginger: My sister taught me from the moment I could hold a doll how to hold cards. When I could talk, she taught me how to call and when I could walk, she taught me how to…wait, where was I going with that?
Ruby: You’re sure your sister is the one who lied all the time in childhood?
Ginger: She would! She would just lie and lie!
Elle: When you would wake her from a sound sleep and pester her with questions, it doesn’t qualify as “lying.”
Fly: Otherwise, Ruby owes me a lot of breakfasts in bed.
Ruby: Wait, when did I promise those?
Fly: Max, I believe it’s time to lay your cards on the table.
Max: I may not be a pro, but I believe this qualifies as two pair – 7’s over 5’s.
Ginger: Oh, man, I’m sunk.
Ruby: I have two pair also. But I’m pretty sure that my Queens beat your 7’s.
Ginger: Man! I had two pair, but there’s no need to show them now. The 7’s beat me already.
Fly: What did you have Ginger?
Ginger: Two red sixes and two black ones. And this crummy Ace of Spades doin’ a whole lotta nothin’ for me.
Elle: Ginger, that’s not…two pair…
Ruby: You just…
Ginger: I didn’t even have two pair? But I thought…rats! I thought I had something for a while.
Fly: You know it doesn’t qualify as a poker face if you don’t know what you have, right?
Ruby: Here you go, Ginge. Live and learn, Max. Even the broken watch is right twice a day.
Ginger: Wait, why am I getting the troops back?
Max: I can’t believe I lost to someone who didn’t even know what she had.
Ginger: What did I have? The ace?
Elle: It’s a bit like losing to a four-year-old, isn’t it?
Ruby: Okay, Max, shuffle and deal. We move on quickly here.
Ginger: That ace rocks! Make sure you give me that again, buddy. I’ll give you an N…
Ruby: You’re precious, honey, precious.
Ginger: Man, I hate playing games I don’t understand…
Fly: Welcome to the other side of conversations with you.
Max: Known her long, have you?
Ruby: Sometimes it feels longer.
Ginger: Okay, now listen up, troops. The enemy’s out there, in the thing called a Pot…
Elle: Here we go again…