Ruby: I’m in the middle of something, can this wait?
Ginger: If you’re in the middle of something, why did you answer the phone?
Ruby: I learned my lesson after thirteen voicemails.
Ginger: It could have been more. I held back.
Ruby: Seriously, I’m really in the middle of something here.
Ginger: Is it a fight?
Ginger: Are you on the toilet?
Ginger: Is it a conversation with another human being?
Ruby: Not…in person.
Ginger: You’re emailing someone while you try to get me to hang up the phone?
Ruby: Actually, yes. Can I call you back once I finish this?
Ginger: No, my phone is acting weird. I’ll wait while you finish.
Ruby: …I don’t have a choice, do I?
Ginger: Not really, no.
Ruby: Fine. I’ll hurry.
Ginger: Take your time.
Ruby: …what are you doing?
Ginger: I didn’t say anything.
Ruby: I know. That concerns me.
Ginger: I told you I’d wait. I’m waiting.
Ruby: You’re scary when you’re waiting. Just tell me what it is.
Ginger: I can wait. Honest.
Ruby: Ginger, just tell me. Why did you call?
Ginger: Do I have to actually take lessons in martial arts in order to be able to fight like Jason Bourne or River Tam?
Ruby: How else would you develop those abilities?
Ginger: I dunno, maybe if I got bitten by a radioactive Matt Damon?
Ruby: …okay, fine, you have a point. If there was a radioactive Matt Damon wandering around the city and biting people and you happened to be one of them, then, clearly, you would be able to just develop Jason Bourne-like skills. However, you would have to be exposed to a gamma-ray-infused Summer Glau on a moonless night in August while holding three copper nails in your left hand in order to gain River Tam skills.
Ginger: I knew you could multi-task!
Ruby: What’s wrong with your phone?
Ruby: You said your phone was acting weird. What’s wrong with it?
Ginger: Oh, mostly it’s the voicemail system.
Ruby: Okay…what’s wrong with the voicemail system?
Ginger: Well, the voice says “If you would like to send a message, press 2,” but when I do, my options don’t make sense.
Ruby: What are the options?
Ginger: None of them offer to send goons, henchmen or hired thugs to a recipient’s house.
Ruby: What kind of message are you trying to send?!
Ginger: Does it matter? That should be an option!
Ruby: Ginger…you’ve now successfully ruined voicemail for me.
Ruby: Yes, Ginger?
Ginger: Is there something I haven’t ruined for you yet?
Ruby: If I tell you, you’ll only ruin it.
Ginger: If you don’t tell me, I’ll go out of my way to share more of my thoughts with you.
Ruby: It’s a risk I’m going to have to… It’s a risk I’m already living.
Ginger: Touché, Ruby. Touché.