Collect Call From The Future, Do You Accept The Charges?

Ruby: Hello, this is Ruby.

Ginger: I’m bored. Entertain me.

Ruby: Why do I get this task?

Ginger: Because my brothers are all busy and my sister has children who demand entertainment and you recently bemoaned the fact that you are, currently, childless.

Ruby: I believe my exact words were “Oh, look, Ginger, it’s a cute baby.”

Ginger: I applied Ginger’s Word Math.

Ruby: You’re supposed to warn me when you do that!

Ginger: Well, I can’t always warn you of future events. I’m not psychic.

Ruby: Well, then, fine. But the future is here.

Ginger: The future?

Ruby: That’s what I said.

Ginger: Already?

Ruby: Yes.

Ginger: But I wasn’t prepared for this!

Ruby: Well, tough.

Ginger: Are there Reavers?

Ruby: No.

Ginger: Vulcans?

Ruby: Not exactly.

Ginger: Flying DeLorians?

Ruby: Only at theme parks.

Ginger: Have we colonized Mars?

Ruby: Yes, I’m calling from there right now.

Ginger: Do firemen set books on fire?

Ruby: What are “books?”

Ginger: Are zombies the newest form of entertainment?

Ruby: They’re not new.

Ginger: Are zombies kept as pets?

Ruby: No, hamsters are all the rage…again.

Ginger: Are zombies the result of some vaccine gone horribly, horribly wrong?

Ruby: No, actually…okay, look…there are no zombies. Well, no more than the usual college campus provides during finals week.

Ginger: Is the world one giant ocean?

Ruby: Is there one giant ocean? Depends on who you ask. Does it cover the entire planet? No.

Ginger: Is the world a giant desert?

Ruby: There are some trees left in the parks.

Ginger: TELL ME!!!!

Ruby: I just said it was here. I didn’t say it was exciting. Or necessarily good.

Ginger: …how disappointing.

Ruby: There, were you entertained? Because I have actual work I’m supposed to be doing right now.

Ginger: Oh, yeah, sure. I’ll stop by later tonight. Want pizza for dinner?

Ruby: You really miss having a roommate, don’t you?

Ginger: Only at dinnertime.

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