Why Didn’t Bond Help Indy With That Pesky Ark?

Ruby: This movie makes almost no sense.

Ginger: I know, right? I love it.

Ruby: For two scenes, it’s a cowboy movie.

Ginger: With Daniel Craig in chaps.

Ruby: And then, all of a sudden, it becomes an alien movie.

Ginger: With Daniel Craig in chaps.

Ruby: And then, there’s…her…

Ginger: Talking to Daniel Craig in chaps.

Ruby: And then, without warning, it becomes an alien movie…

Ginger: With Daniel Craig in chaps.

Ruby: And, now, for twenty minutes, it’s been a cowboy movie.

Ginger: With Daniel Craig in chaps.

Ruby: Yes, Ginger. Daniel Craig in chaps. Got it.

Ginger: You weren’t saying it, so I had to confirm you had noticed.

Ruby: This movie makes almost no sense.

Ginger: I know. Since when does Indiana Jones fight James Bond? You’re on the same side!

Ruby: …Ginger, you are aware that the Wild West did not occur at the same time as World War II, right?

Ginger: But that guy from Windtalkers is right there! He’s in Indy’s gang!

Ruby: It’s not the same time period!

Ginger: Ruby, you just watched a cowboy ride the horse along the canyon wall and leap onto the flying alien spacecraft that lassos and kidnaps other cowboys.

Ruby: …yes…?

Ginger: Why should I expect historical eras to keep to the known timeline? Honestly, I’m a little offended no one has demanded the cowboys steal an alien flying craft and go help Robin Hood take down the corrupt Sheriff of Nottingham.

Ruby: You have an excellent point. Where is Robin Hood’s American support team?

Ginger: And why hasn’t C-3PO wandered through the scene cursing his metal body?

Ruby: This movie makes more sense, now that you’ve put it into perspective.

Ginger: I didn’t put anything into perspective. You just finally noticed Daniel Craig.

Ruby: In chaps.

Ginger: I’m not usually a Daniel Craig fan…or really a fan of chaps…but then, you put the two together…

Ruby: In one of the most bizarre movies I’ve ever watched…

Ginger: And it becomes one of my favorite movies.

Ruby: You would have liked this even without Daniel Craig in chaps.

Ginger: …so true.

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s