Evil Is Contagious

Ruby: Hello?

Ginger: Why?

Ruby: Why what?

Ginger: Why did you call me at this moment in time?

Ruby: I didn’t.

Ginger: Are you sure?

Ruby: Pretty sure.

Ginger: Check your phone.

Ruby: Ginger, you called me.

Ginger: I didn’t.

Ruby: You did.

Ginger: I did not.

Ruby: Check your phone.

Ginger: I didn’t call you because my TV show is not in a commercial break and you know I can’t DVR it.

Ruby: Ginger, I didn’t call you!

Ginger: Fine! I just randomly called you without even thinking about it while watching a show I know you hate to watch just so I could tell you what’s going on in this episode? Is that what you want me to say?

Ruby: If it’s the truth, yes.

Ginger: I’m hanging up – I’m missing important plot points!

Ruby: Okay.

Ginger: I mean, even if he could get the Mark of Cain off his arm, no one knows if he’d survive the process or the withdrawal of the Mark.

Ruby: I thought you were hanging up.

Ginger: The commercial’s on now.

Ruby: Right.

Ginger: You have to admit, there’s got to be something he’ll miss about having the Mark on his arm. Not being able to die at the hands of a crazy centuries-old Scottish witch lady being at the top of the list.

Ruby: I’m not asking you any questions. That only encourages this type of behavior.

Ginger: What behavior? You called me!

Ruby: No, I did not!

Ginger: You did! I don’t call you with updates to TV shows you don’t watch while they’re still on the air.

Ruby: Ginger, I promise you – I did NOT call you.

Ginger: Well, I know I didn’t call you. And the show’s back on. I’m hanging up.

Ruby: Fine.

Ginger: Bye!

Ruby: Bye.

Fly: …do it again.

Ruby: I can’t for another three minutes. She’ll catch on. And eventually, she will check her phone.

Fly: But by then, we’ll have turned our phones to silent and gone to bed.

Ruby: You’ve never been the victim of a Ginger Voicemail Attack, have you?

Fly: All I know is that this is fun.

Ruby: …yeah. It really is. Ooh – turn on the TV. Now that I know what she’s watching, we can time the call for when the suspense is at its peak!

Fly: …Ginger really has rubbed off on you, y’know.

Ruby: This was your idea.

Fly: Touché.


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