Ultimate Ultron

Ruby: What are you watching?

Ginger: Well, remember last night how we watched Avengers: Age of Ultron?

Ruby: Yes. It was last night.

Ginger: And then remember how last night, when we were watching Avengers: Age of Ultron, I was all “oh wow, I could just watch him all day”?

Ruby: Yes. Because it was last night.

Ginger: Well, I found a way to watch him all day.

Ruby: …yeah, that’s not Chris Evans.

Ginger: …what?

Ruby: Isn’t that who you were talking about last night?

Ginger: Last night when?

Ruby: Remember last night, we watched this movie called Avengers: Age of Ultron?

Ginger: Yes. I think so. Maybe. Why?

Ruby: Remember, how, last night, when we were watching this movie called Avengers: Age of Ultron and Captain America was looking all Captain America-ish and you said “oh, wow, I could just watch him all day?”

Ginger: I have a vague memory of saying that…

Ruby: Chris Evans plays Captain America in Avengers: Age of Ultron.

Ginger: I do actually know that.

Ruby: Well, I’m telling you right now – THAT is NOT Chris Evans.

Ginger: No. It’s not. That is Diego Klattenhoff.

Ruby: I’ll trust you on that.

Ginger: Okay, good.

Ruby: Wait, was he in Avengers: Age of Ultron?

Ginger: Not that I know of…

Ruby: So…wait. I’m confused.

Ginger: Okay, no worries. It’s really simple.

Ruby: If you bring up watching Avengers: Age of Ultron last night, I will walk out of here before you can finish saying you could watch him all day.

Ginger: …it’s kind of key to the whole explanation.

Ruby: Is that Chris Evans?

Ginger: Him? No. That’s Ryan Eggold.

Ruby: Have you found a way to watch Chris Evans all day?

Ginger: Well, totally off-topic, I’ve always known how to watch Chris Evans all day. I have the capability on my DVD shelf.

Ruby: Then what are you watching?!

Ginger: I found a way to watch ULTRON all day!

Ruby: …you were talking about Ultron?

Ginger: Yes! Weren’t you paying attention last night?

Ruby: …you were talking about ULTRON??

Ginger: I think you got confused because I said I could watch him all day when Captain America was fighting Ultron on top of the truck.

Ruby: There is no large robot thing on this show!

Ginger: No. There is not. But Ultron is on this show nonetheless. It’s the same character, essentially…

Ruby: There’s a giant robot thing intent on killing the Avengers in order to save the world from itself?

Ginger: …if you substitute “giant robot thing” with “amazingly well-mannered man in a black hat” and change “killing the Avengers” to “methodically remove exceptionally evil crime lords from power” and replace “save the world from itself” with “for scheming and methodical reasons yet unknown,” then…yes. Exactly.

Ruby: Can we just start over?

Ginger: You want the simple version, don’t you?

Ruby: Yes.

Ginger: But it’s boring.

Ruby: What are you watching?

Ginger: …The Blacklist.

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