Schrödinger’s Ginger

Ruby: I can’t believe this happened. Again.

Fly: You have no one to blame but yourself, this time.

Elle: I thought we were blaming her obsession with Christian Kane. And those Librarian movies.

Ruby: We can’t be sure what we will find when we open this door until we open the door.

Fly: It’s Schrödinger’s Ginger.

Elle: …what?

Ruby: Fly, be honest with me now – did you put a time-release-capsule-of-poison in the linen closet with Ginger?

Fly: No. Did you?

Elle: You’re the one who works in a hospital. You’re the one who would have access to time-release-capsules-of-poison.

Fly: True, but you’re the one who provided her with a laptop.

Elle: I thought she would use it to work from home.

Fly: In the linen closet?

Elle: Ruby said there was wifi in there!

Ruby: We have to focus! We don’t know what state of mind she’ll be in. She might quote The Librarians and insist she has to go track down some magical artifact she thinks she’s located in Lawrence, Kansas…

Elle: You crossed two shows, there Ruby.

Fly: You think Ginger won’t?

Elle: …please continue.

Ruby: Or she might think she’s in Grimm and insist one of us is Wesen…

Fly: She’s done that before. She quits when she realizes she can’t actually pronounce German, so, I’m hoping for that.

Ruby: Or she might have found a new show…

Elle: And how would she have found that?

Ruby: …it’s Ginger.

Fly: Also, Ruby told her about some show Ruby has been binge-watching this past week.

Elle: Well, she couldn’t have gotten too far in it, could she?

Ruby: It’s. Ginger.

Elle: Rats. She already started writing fan fics for it, hasn’t she?

Ruby: Not that I’ve seen on the chatboards. Yet.

Elle: It’s definitely Schrödinger’s Ginger. Next time, Ruby, don’t let her camp out in your linen closet.

Ruby: Next time, we’ll just go to Vienna.

Fly: Ready? One…two…three!

Ruby: …Ginger? Are you in here?

Elle: Ginger, it’s okay to leave now. I…have coordinates for the rogue Blutbad in Lawrence, Kansas who has…Aesop’s…original scroll…and…

Ruby: …and has the antidote for the crew of the Raza

Fly: …and if none of that strikes your fancy, I have chocolate.

Ginger: I like chocolate! …what was all that other stuff you said you had?

Ruby: Ginger…we thought you were locked in the linen closet.

Ginger: …why would you think that?

Fly: Because we haven’t heard from you in days.

Elle: And I gave you a laptop. When you were in the linen closet.

Ruby: How did you get out?

Ginger: …it’s a linen closet. It’s not exactly a vault with some secret password that pertains to a grade school teacher. I turned the knob, applied pressure to the door, and left.

Fly: Now who wishes I brought home some time-release-poison-capsules?

Ginger: …this is chocolate, right?

Fly: Sure.

Ginger: Meh. Worth it.

Elle: When did you get out?

Ginger: After I finished all of season one of Dark Matter. Where’s the next season? I need to know what happens to Zoe 2.0, Simon 2.0, Jayne 2.0, Book-Wash 2.0, River 2.0 and Kaylee 2.0.

Fly: You told me that show wasn’t related to Firefly!

Ruby: I told you it wasn’t specifically related to Firefly!

Elle: Season 2 isn’t available for binge-streaming yet, Ginger.

Ginger: …you know what this means, don’t you?

Ruby: Oh, no…

Elle: She doesn’t mean…

Fly: Now who wishes I brought home some time-release-poison-capsules?

Ginger: It’s time to re-watch ALL OF FIREFLY!!!!!!

Elle: I blame you.

Ruby: I have only myself to blame.

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