I Can Do This All Day…

Ginger: Ruby, I have a very important question to ask you.

Ruby: Please tell me you’re asking me to play Bananagrams.

Ginger: No. This is far more important.

Ruby: …but?

Ginger: …start flipping tiles. Now I want to play Bananagrams. But I still have to ask you the very important question.

Ruby: Okay.

Ginger: Are you Team Captain or Team Iron Man?

Ruby: …um…I’m…confused about what these teams are.

Ginger: Team Captain – peel, by the way – is made up of Captain America, The Falcon, Hawkeye, The Scarlet Witch, Ant Man, Bucky…basically, all the intelligent and awesome supers. Peel.

Ruby: I’m still confused – why do I have to choose a team? I’m…not a superheroine. Dump.

Ginger: Team Iron Man is made up of – peel – Iron Man, Black Widow, War Machine, The Vision, and Black Panther. Peel.

Ruby: Ooh! I needed that!

Ginger: Nice! If you move that O to that spot, and the M and N there and you use that A, you have MANGO.

Ruby: Stop helping. If you’re bored, say Peel and get your next letter.

Ginger: Choose a Team.

Ruby: I’m on Team…Civilian. I get to sit in the audience and watch the explosions through my fingers and…wait, which team has Chris Evans?

Ginger: Team Cap.

Ruby: So, you’re Team Cap. Peel.

Ginger: Obviously. But not just because of Chris Evans.

Ruby: Right. Peel.

Ginger: I read the graphic novel the movie is based on and I’ve thought about it and I honestly think it’s the team that is best.

Ruby: Absolutely. Peel.

Ginger: I mean, what they stand for, what their leader does and doesn’t do in order to protect basic human rights…

Ruby: Sure, sure. Peel.

Ginger: So, you’re Team Cap?

Ruby: No. I’m Team Iron Man. Peel.

Ginger: What? Why?!

Ruby: Well, you said it has Iron Man, Scarlet Witch, The Seeing Eye Dog…

Ginger: VISION.

Ruby: Peel. Whatever. The point is, that sounds like a strong team.

Ginger: How could you possibly say that? I just explained Team Cap stands for protecting basic human rights!

Ruby: But it doesn’t have Robert Downey, Jr. Also, peel.

Ginger: Iron Man wants to have all the supers monitored at all times! Registered and monitored and give up their – oh! Yeah! He makes Spiderman reveal his secret identity!

Ruby: Spiderman is in the movie? Peel.

Ginger: Yes! And I can’t believe you would side against me on this!

Ruby: What team is Spiderman on? Peel.

Ginger: Team Iron Man. But—

Ruby: But nothing, Ginger. Team Iron Man has Iron Man, Spiderman, Scarlet Witch, Visionaries—

Ginger: VISION.

Ruby: Peel. The Panther guy, the other Iron Man guy…and all your team has is a couple of science experiments and some fancy tech.

Ginger: Know what else my team has?

Ruby: What?

Ginger: The skills to destroy you in Bananagrams even when you think you’re winning.

Ruby: …you…weren’t even paying attention!

Ginger: What can I say, Rubes? When you play Bananagrams against my mother, you learn to play real Bananagrams.

Ruby: Did you…spell out words related to Captain America: Civil War?

Ginger: I was mildly impressed myself, honestly.

Ruby: Rematch.

Ginger: I can do this all day.


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