Ruby: How do you have so many books?

Ginger: I’m pretty sure they’re multiplying like rabbits when I turn out the lights.

Ruby: While that doesn’t make sense…I’m not convinced it’s not true, either.

Ginger: I don’t recall buying all of them, so it is really the only answer at this point.

Ruby: What would a pregnant book look like?

Ginger: Are you sure they don’t lay eggs? I feel like a book might lay an egg.

Ruby: Okay, what would an egg of a book look like?

Ginger: A folded piece of paper. I’ve seen a lot of those around my bookcases.

Ruby: I have, too…I’m noticing a lot of them around my bookcases, now that you mention it.

Ginger: That explains your multitudes of books, as well.

Ruby: I’ll have to break it to Fly gently.

Ginger: Yes, we’ve solved the mystery of book eggs. Onto the next puzzle…

Ruby: Are bookends conducive to book-breeding?

Ginger: …no, I was going with Where Do They Keep The Twine.

Ruby: Oh. That is a puzzle.

Ginger: You’re in a strange mood…

Ruby: You made me tie books all morning with the promise we could go to the yarn store when we finished.

Ginger: Well, I didn’t know I’d run out of twine before we finished one bookcase!

Ruby: So, let’s get twine so we can finish and then go to the yarn store!

Ginger: Yeah, I’m not seeing any twine…

Ruby: Maybe you should ask a store clerk.

Ginger: Here comes someone… Excuse me, do you have twine?

Sales Girl: Do we have what?

Ginger: Twine.

Sales Girl: What is that?

Ruby: It’s like kite string, or thin rope.

Ginger: You use it to tie books together for a move.

Sales Girl: Why do you tie books together? Can’t you put them in a box?

Ruby: No, they’ll lay book eggs and then you’ll end up with more books than you can manage.

Sales Girl: That happens?

Ginger: …wow. No. Do you know what a book is?

Sales Girl: I know what an eReader is.

Ruby: Okay, even I wasn’t that rude when I suggested that back at your apartment…

Ginger: Look, I ran out of twine when I was tying my books together. I need more twine because I have more books. Actual, physical books that I can hold in my hands and use to kill small insects or build furniture for tiny statues and stuffed animals.

Ruby: Outdated technology.

Sales Girl: Well, we don’t sell twine.

Ginger: A minute ago, you didn’t even know what it was.

Sales Girl: Whatever. If we sell it, then it’s there in household goods.

Ginger: Okay. I’m going to ask someone else.

Sales Girl: Fine.

Ruby: I’ll ask the next person.

Ginger: That might be a good plan. Oh, ask him – he looks like he was born before smart phone technology was commonplace.

Ruby: Good plan. Excuse us, sir, do you know where we can find twine?

Sales Guy: Ooh. Twine. Right…twine…twine…twine…hmm… Remind me what that is?

Ginger: I give up.

Ruby: Thin rope. Light string or strong thread, composed of two (or more) smaller strands or yarns twisted, then twisted together.

Ginger: Used to tie books when moving from one home to another.

Sales Guy: OH. TWINE. Right. We don’t have that here.

Ruby: It’s my turn to give up.

Sales Guy: We have Jute Rope, though.

Ginger: What’s Jute Rope?

Sales Guy: Um, it’s…uh….here. It’s this.

Ruby & Ginger: It’s TWINE.

Sales Guy: …so it is.

Ginger: I have to stop my books from laying eggs…

Sales Guy: Books lay eggs?

Ruby: Yes. Yes, they do. And then, when you have to move, you convince one of your friends to help you tie the books and their offspring into stacks so that you can move all the books that have hatched to the new home without packing books into boxes, where they’ll be in the dark, laying more book eggs.

Ginger: It happens more often than you’d think.

Sales Guy: …this explains my girlfriend’s book collection…

Ginger: See, Ruby? It’s not just us!

Ruby: I’m still not convinced twine is the best solution.

Ginger: Why not?

Ruby: You’re just encouraging the books’ lust for each other.

Sales Guy: How?

Ginger: Oh, wait…I think I know where this is going…

Ruby: You’re just entwining them together!

Ginger: …no more caffeine for you.

Ruby: You made me tie books all morning!


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