Why Would A Doctor Reserve A Hostile Bed?

Ruby: For the last time, Ginger, just because you saw it on Grey’s Anatomy, it doesn’t mean it’s true.

Ginger: Okay, first? It was not on Grey’s Anatomy.

Ruby: Fly, we’re back from the store…

Fly: So I hear. Should I ask what we’re debating, or just save myself the aspirin for the headache that is sure to follow?

Ginger: Fly, when you sleep overnight in the hospital and you’re on call, do you have to reserve space on a bunk bed in an on-call room or is that only for late-night-trysts of a forbidden nature?

Fly: …I hope you picked up more aspirin.

Ruby: The extra large bottle.

Fly: I knew I married you for a reason…

Ginger: Yes, yes, yes, you love each other because I’m the crazy one. Seriously, answer the question.

Fly: I usually sleep in my office chair.

Ruby: See? Wait, what?

Fly: Yeah, I can close the door, it’s relatively private and the chair is pretty comfy if I’m tired enough.

Ginger: Plus there’s the couch.

Ruby: You’ve seen his office at the hospital?

Fly: What couch?

Ginger: I imagine there’s a couch there. There’s a couch in every office in the hospital on Saving Hope.

Fly: I don’t have a couch in my office.

Ruby: I don’t believe you. She says there’s a couch in every office in the hospital on a Canadian TV show.

Ginger: Maybe his couch is getting re-upholstered and that’s why he sleeps in the chair.

Ruby: Is your office couch getting re-upholstered?

Fly: I don’t have a couch in my office!

Ginger: Well, you said you sleep in your office and not in the bunk beds made for trysts!

Ruby: It’s an on-call room, Ginger. It’s not supposed to be a five-star-hotel experience.

Fly: Oh, wait, I seem to recall an on-call room on this one floor…

Ginger: Were there hostel bunk beds in every corner?

Ruby: Why would a bunk bed be hostile?

Ginger: No, no, hostel – a cheap youth motel you only ever stay in once to learn your lesson.

Ruby: Oh. Right.

Fly: May I continue?

Ruby: Please.

Fly: There was a lobby – it was like…Shangri-La…there was an attendant there with freshly laundered robes and towels…the attendant would hand you a key on a golden chain and you’d go to the most exquisitely comfortable room with a door that locked and you could shower, rest and wake feeling like you actually slept… It was magnificent.

Ginger: Wow…

Ruby: This is where you slept when you worked at the hospital overnight?

Fly: It was also a dream. That I had while sleeping in my office chair.

Ruby: Why don’t you ever let me come stay overnight in the hospital and sleep in the Shangri-La rooms?

Fly: Because it was a dream.

Ginger: I think it’s just rude to let your wife assume you’re sleeping in a hostile bed with romantic trysts going on all around you in those reserved bunk beds when you’re actually sleeping in a heavenly doctors-only-7-star-hotel.

Fly: It was a dream! It’s not real! Why do you two get to go off on crazy tangents all the time, and it’s fine, but when I try, I get accused of…..there’s no such thing as a 7-star-hotel, Ginger.

Ruby: Don’t try to change the subject! When do you work late next? I’m packing a bag and coming with you!

Ginger: Man, now I wish I married a doctor, too…

Fly: If that’s what the on-call rooms were like – anywhere – why would I sleep in my office chair??

Ginger: Because the couch is getting re-upholstered!

Ruby: Scroll up, Fly!

Fly: ……..just give me the aspirin. I give up.

Ginger: So, is now the time to point out he never answered the question about needing to reserve bunk beds?

Ruby: Probably not.


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