Magic Rex or Jurassic Mike?

Ruby: Ginger? Where are you?

Ginger: In here…

Ruby: Your text said this was urgent. I assumed it had to do with cooking.

Ginger: Aside from “urgent,” what led you to believe it had to do with cooking?

Ruby: Your full text reads “URGENT – need you here – Mom confused.” I assumed you meant your mother confused you with your sister who functions perfectly fine in the kitchen. Even without burning ice cream.

Ginger: How was I supposed to know making ice cream doesn’t involve an open flame?

Ruby: …we’re moving on. What confused your mother? Did you tell her about the time you tried to fry up some ice cream?

Ginger: No. I’ve been staring at this text from her and I can’t…I can’t figure out how to respond.

Ruby: What does the text say?

Ginger: Background first…

Ruby: Right. Why would it be simple?

Ginger: Mom was trying to show my nephew a specific scene in Jurassic World, so she was using the scene selection on the Blu-Ray.

Ruby: Okay.

Ginger: The text reads “What chapter do the raptors come out with Channing Tatum?”

Ruby: …wow.

Ginger: Yeah.

Ruby: You told her it’s Chris Pratt, right?

Ginger: I wanted to, but…

Ruby: …but?

Ginger: But every time I start to text a response, all I can see are Velociraptors in cufflinks and bowties circling a pole, bouncing in rhythm with My Pony by Ginuwine.

Ruby: …do they look like Chippendale’s Raptors?

Ginger: …they do.

Ruby: Tell your mother it’s Chris Pratt. Maybe that will make the image go away for both of us…

Ginger: Okay. I’ll try that.

Ruby: …I can’t remove the image of a raptor just…twirling…around the pole now…

Ginger: I know. And now the rest of them are lining up and…posing…?




Ruby: What did your mom say in reply?

Ginger: …her entire text reads “one pretty face looks like another.”

Ruby: …did you TELL her about the Chippen-raptors?

Ginger: I don’t think it’ll matter.

Ruby: I don’t think it will, either…I just…want them gone from my mind…

Ginger: We all do, Ruby…we all do…


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